I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize