rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
