Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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