I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
