so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
