there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
