"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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