Redeem this text for a blowjob
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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