Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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