I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
