love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
