Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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