I didn't shave. On purpose
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
