And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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