do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
