When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
