these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
