I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize