I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize