ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
