another moral hangover. fuck.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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