My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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