Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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