If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
