I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Randomize
