I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
