I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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