i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
