You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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