My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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