dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Randomize
