so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
