so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You took a bar mat shot.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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