yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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