apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
