Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
