i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Randomize
