is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
