Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
