He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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