laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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