Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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