Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
