did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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