Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
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