how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
sex in a hospital.. check
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize