I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize