i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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