How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize