I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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