The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
